Back to confession

A couple of days ago I went to Books A Million in Monroe to catch up with an old friend. It was so reassuring, knowing that I'm not the only one struggling to find contentment when I cannot know the future. After he left I looked around for a while before leaving myself. On my way out I heard someone say "Hey!" Not sure if it was directed at me, I kept walking. The call rang out again...it was obvious the voice was calling to me. I turned around and a middle aged guy approached. The story that came next I've heard a hundred times or more: he was out of luck, his family was struggling in Winnsborro, and he asked me in the name of God if I could give him two or three dollars for gas to reach them. Uncomfortable with the situation, I just handed a couple of bucks over. I'm quite certain those dollars were not spent on auto fuel. With gas prices around the mid $2.-- range...one gallon would hardly make it out of Monroe proper.

Here's the truth: I paid him to leave me alone. Here's another truth: I did not walk in step with the Spirit.

I know that I've become more hardened than I should in the past year. If I could re-do that situation, I would walk with him to the gas pump and offer to give him what he requested. The point of doing this is not so much avoiding being lied to, but rather engaging the man. By walking with him I would give him the attention he deserves as a created being and loved by God. I could know him in that moment. If he would let me buy the gas, wonderful. If not, then truth could be shone and forgiveness might be offered. I had and have no way of knowing the man's situation. That said, as beloved ragamuffins finding our redemption we are called to love the poor. If the poor would try and swindle us, we would find no more real a moment to love them than the moment of truth.

An amazing Shakespeare quote: "the quality of mercy is not strained"

I've failed a thousand times to bring the Kingdom to earth. In fact, if you saw me for who I really am you might think I am trying to stop its arrival.

Mercies are new every morning...and even now if we toss our crowns.